{"id":9354,"date":"2021-12-07T17:24:15","date_gmt":"2021-12-07T17:24:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/pregnancyoptions.spence-chapin.org\/?p=9354"},"modified":"2024-10-16T18:23:17","modified_gmt":"2024-10-16T18:23:17","slug":"the-woman-who-experienced-both-sides-of-open-adoption","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/pregnancyoptions.spence-chapin.org\/es\/the-woman-who-experienced-both-sides-of-open-adoption\/","title":{"rendered":"La mujer que experiment\u00f3 ambos lados de la adopci\u00f3n abierta"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Ereshnee grew up as an Indian woman in South Africa. After becoming pregnant at 17 years old, she decided to make an adoption plan. Her mother knew about her pregnancy but very few other relatives were aware. Her father was not told about the pregnancy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ereshnee bonded closely with her social worker from the adoption agency, who she called more of an \u201caunt\u201d than a social worker. Her social worker often drove her to doctor\u2019s appointments and they have event stayed in touch over the years. Ereshnee insisted on an open adoption \u2013 which at the time, were rare, particularly in South Africa. Only two families would be willing to have ongoing contact with a birth mother.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ereshnee placed her son in 1993 when she was 18 years old. Upon giving birth, a nurse took her son from her and simply said \u201che\u2019s going to be adopted.\u201d The adoptive mother intervened and advocated for Ereshnee to spend some time with the infant, and she went on to spend three days in the hospital caring for him.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ereshnee went on to college and became a birth parent advocate and educated conservative Indian families in South Africa about the benefits of open adoption.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ereshnee went on to immigrate to the United States in 2009 and continued to have a very positive open adoption with her son and his family. When she married Paul, her son was a part of their wedding party. Ereshnee\u2019s extended family met her son but it was not known to most people who he was or his relationship with Ereshnee. However, those closest to her were always aware, and more became aware of her story over the years. Ereshnee explains \u201cmy relationship really started growing with him after my dad died \u2013 because until the day he died he didn\u2019t know I had had a baby.\u201d&nbsp; Ereshnee&#8217;s husband, Paul, developed his own relationship with Ereshnee\u2019s son \u2013 Ereshnee says they are \u201ctotal pals.\u201d Ereshnee\u2019s younger brother also has an extremely close connection to his nephew.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>After struggling to have a biological child, Paul and Ereshnee decided to consider adoption and Ereshnee reached out to her old social worker from South Africa. The woman explained that she was retiring but the children\u2019s home she now worked for is partnered with Spence-Chapin and told her to reach out about their adoption programs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"alignright size-large is-resized\"><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/spence-chapin.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/Ereshnee-4-738x1024.jpeg\" alt=\"Ereshnee 4\" class=\"wp-image-18044\" width=\"258\" height=\"358\"\/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>After several years, Paul and Ereshnee were chosen by a young woman who had recently given birth to a baby boy. On July 30, 2020, at the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, they welcomed their son, Aadya, into the family. They chose an open adoption and continue to remain in close communication with Aadya\u2019s birth mother.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When asked about the relationship with her biological son \u2013 who is now in his late 20s, and her infant son, Ereshnee laughs and says her older son calls himself the \u201cbig brother\u201d and he, along with his adoptive family were thrilled for Paul and Ereshnee. They were all in attendance at Aadya\u2019s virtual adoption finalization in March 2021. Ereshnee&#8217;s first son&#8217;s adoptive mother has taken on the role of a \u201cgranny\u201d to Aadya and receives photos of him regularly. \u201cThere are no names for these relationships,\u201d Ereshnee explains of this large family born through adoption.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When asked how the relationship with her biological son has changed, Ereshnee says \u201cthis is the first year I came out openly [as his birth mother]\u2026I wrote on his Facebook on his birthday that he will always be my little baby. My family is friends with him on Facebook as he\u2019s been to family events, but it was still news to so many people\u2026I don\u2019t know but I think having Aadya in my life opened me up to letting everyone into the space to know.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ereshnee went on to discuss how her biological son and his adoptive mother have a very close relationship with her relatives in South Africa, particularly Ereshnee&#8217;s mother. \u201cWhen she makes collages of all her grandchildren, my son is right in the center with the other children.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When asked to reflect on Aadya, who has been home for almost a year now, she says \u201cHe\u2019s such a joy, everyday he\u2019s just so happy.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter size-large is-resized\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/spence-chapin.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/Ereshnee-1-786x1024.jpeg\" alt=\"Ereshnee 1\" class=\"wp-image-18043\" width=\"268\" height=\"349\"\/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>If you or someone you know has an unplanned pregnancy, reach out to one of our social workers today. <a href=\"https:\/\/pregnancyoptions.spence-chapin.org\/contact\/\">www.yourpregnancychoices.org\/contact\/<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ereshnee grew up as an Indian woman in South Africa. After becoming pregnant at 17 years old, she decided to make an adoption plan. Her mother knew about her pregnancy but very few other relatives were aware. Her father was not told about the pregnancy. Ereshnee bonded closely with her social worker from the adoption [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":9356,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_price":"","_stock":"","_tribe_ticket_header":"","_tribe_default_ticket_provider":"","_tribe_ticket_capacity":"0","_ticket_start_date":"","_ticket_end_date":"","_tribe_ticket_show_description":"","_tribe_ticket_show_not_going":false,"_tribe_ticket_use_global_stock":"","_tribe_ticket_global_stock_level":"","_global_stock_mode":"","_global_stock_cap":"","_tribe_rsvp_for_event":"","_tribe_ticket_going_count":"","_tribe_ticket_not_going_count":"","_tribe_tickets_list":"[]","_tribe_ticket_has_attendee_info_fields":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[1140],"class_list":["post-9354","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-birth-mom"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>The Woman Who Experienced Both Sides of Open Adoption - Your Pregnancy Choices<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/pregnancyoptions.spence-chapin.org\/es\/the-woman-who-experienced-both-sides-of-open-adoption\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"es_MX\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Woman Who Experienced Both Sides of Open Adoption - Your Pregnancy Choices\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Ereshnee grew up as an Indian woman in South Africa. 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